Two weeks ago, I was given the instruction: ask God to tell you what he thinks of you, ask God if you have what it takes. I was told that God would definately give me an answer, and for all I could see it would be some sort of clear-concise message. On Wednesday of this week I spent some time with God, and at the end I asked him, God, what do you think of me? – I heard nothing, I felt nothing, I saw nothing. Nothing. I was disapointed and upset with God. I was really quite angry. I said: why can everyone else hear you say things to them, and I hear nothing. Why have you never uttered a single word to me?
But I noticed something this week. I still hold out hope that one day, I’ll have some clear revelation of God, but for now I can see that God speaks to me through circumstances and events. This weekend I’ve successfully engaged in a number of activites. I talked to a guest at our outreach program and really connected with them. I prayed for a friend like I’d never prayed before. I stepped out socially – I succeeded in something I thought I was awful at. I’ve done so many things this weekend that I never thought I could do. And I’ve had that drive to do them, that there had always been too much resistance in the past to act on it. Thankyou God for working in my life. I still yearn to hear your voice, but for now I will believe your hand is on my life, and that with your blessing, I have what it takes.

Good news, I’ve finally got my new glasses. I really like the way they look and they go dark in the sun. They’re the glasses that I’ve always wanted. And more importantly, they are all in one piece, unlike my last pair… Also on the same day I got myself a haircut. I felt pretty good about the way I looked by the end of the day.

Also, my boss bought a laptop for me to use exclusively and take home, to uni, to church, anywhere. I’m using it now to write this blog, It’s so cool.

Well, here I am on the other site of the most awesome week of the
year for our church, our anual winter youth camp. How does it feel,
pretty good. Surf camp is usually a time of chalenge for me, since it
is way out of my comfort zone, and every year I get a little better at
interacting with people.

This year I’d have to say that I really missed having Ben on
camp. He’s got to be one of my best friends ever, poor guy couldnt
afford to come on camp, and nobody even offered to help him out So I
had to try to make new friends, and to a degree I had some ‘success’. I
get on well with all the guys that were in my dorm / cell group, and I
think that Than man Is really awsome! I spent alot of time with my
older friend steve though, who doesnt really have any other friends in
one80, which kinda sucks. So that was a bit of a challenge.

Also it was my youth pastor Kristie’s last ever surf camp as
leader, wich was quite sad, and It kinda made me anxious, because I’m
quite attached to her. But at the same time I was really loving our
guest speaker for camp Tim. He was a really great guy who could
encourage and befriend me in ways that a female pastor just cant. So
after that, Im really exited about Kristie’s brother Adrian taking over
the reigns at One80, especially since Ade and I are already in a
mentoring kinda relationship, Ade rocks. Anyway, that’s personal enough
for today

A big thanks goes out to all those on production during the
week. Life-of-purpose, you did a wonderful job of lyrics, and I hope
that you’ll be on team this coming term. There’s still more to learn
and practice makes perfect, but you’re off to a great start. I only had
to do production twice out of eight times, wich was an incredible
blessing from God, that I cant thank Him enough for. I’m hoping this
year to create two unsupervised teams, so I can spend more time in
worship and just soaking up God’s presence.

I went for a sunrise walk on the first day and it was
magnificent, I was reminded of how glorious God is, and how much he
cares for us that he would paint a new sunrise for us every morning. I
also went for a bushwalk with Rod, Kristie, Kate and a younger guy Paul
who I talked to a bit and I think he’s really cool. (super smart).
Also, we made our own way back to the camp – stuff the trail, we’ll
just go this way – awesome. There’s probably heaps of other stuff to
talk about, but let’s just say I had a good time

For a while now, I’ve been wondering what God wants me to do with my life, and I’ve had a basic Idea of the direction that He wants me to head. Just recently, though, I’ve realised how I might go about fulfilling this dream. Basically, the idea is thus: I’m not called to be a missionary or a pastor – that’s just not who God made me – although I am ready and willing to share the Gospel with people who come into my life, and to share my testimony with them. I am also willing to be a mentor to younger Christians, and help pass on what I have learned from others. What I beieve God wants me to do is to go to other small churches and bless them with the talents that God has given me with technical things. The two things that I do that are the most fulfiling are coordinating production for our sunday services (that means sound, lights and song words) and handling the technical requirements of our church office. Basically, I believe that God wants me to take this to other churches and bless them. I figured out today, that in a sense, this is what soul survivor does with their ‘Soul Teams’. They go to churches and give their band a night off, and bless them with their awesome musical talents, and preaching. I think that in the future I would like to join them and give other churches tech teams a night off, and if asked, show them how to do what I do.

It’s been over a year since I last wrote a blog entry. I guess I just got to busy to keep it up. Lately however, there has been an urge to write stuff down again, especially since a lot of stuff is happening in my life right now that I would like to remember, and since my memory for these things is horrible, Microsoft has provided me a convineient way to memorise it all (Take care of my blogs Microsoft!). Nonetheless, a quick summary of what is happening right now. I’m still at University when I should have finished last year, and I’ll be there for another 12 months, I’m working and I love my Job as a programmer. I’m now production coordinator for my church and youth group and hence I look after anything technical that the church needs or wants. Personally, I am working on being slower to anger and quicker to love, being self-controlled, and ebracing God’s Holy Spirit more. Since I’ve stared on this, God has taken me on a wild journey, challenging what I thought were the limits of Christianity. So that’s about it for my summary, I’ll be speaking in detail every now and then.

My friend Matt Gelding has often brought to mind the concept of kindness evangelism; random kind acts for people that allow you to share a glimse of God with the world. I actually find it quite fun when I get into it. For that reason, I just love hitchhikers, because they are free kindness evangelism waiting to be picked. (just to be clear, hitchhikers being the ones asking for a lift, I don’t harrass people) I picked up a man tonight on my way home and we had a quick chat about church, and I got to share a bit of my testimony – booring sunday school turned encounter with jesus turned brand new life – Which is really suited to his type (he was baptised catholic). I don’t know if our conversation will have any major impact on his life, but maybe it will be the seed that someone else harvests later, maybe he will go to bed thinking about it… In any case, I wont reject someone asking for a lift just because I won’t see the fruit of it. I love it.