Two weeks ago, I was given the instruction: ask God to tell you what he thinks of you, ask God if you have what it takes. I was told that God would definately give me an answer, and for all I could see it would be some sort of clear-concise message. On Wednesday of this week I spent some time with God, and at the end I asked him, God, what do you think of me? – I heard nothing, I felt nothing, I saw nothing. Nothing. I was disapointed and upset with God. I was really quite angry. I said: why can everyone else hear you say things to them, and I hear nothing. Why have you never uttered a single word to me?
But I noticed something this week. I still hold out hope that one day, I’ll have some clear revelation of God, but for now I can see that God speaks to me through circumstances and events. This weekend I’ve successfully engaged in a number of activites. I talked to a guest at our outreach program and really connected with them. I prayed for a friend like I’d never prayed before. I stepped out socially – I succeeded in something I thought I was awful at. I’ve done so many things this weekend that I never thought I could do. And I’ve had that drive to do them, that there had always been too much resistance in the past to act on it. Thankyou God for working in my life. I still yearn to hear your voice, but for now I will believe your hand is on my life, and that with your blessing, I have what it takes.